Tonight a fear was borrowed from the past and buried deep within.

Saddened by the voiceless steps, as no creaking or sound erupted from the stairwell. As speechless ghosts were not found, were not roaming about. As droplets of rain stopped impacting the rooftop and the hailstorm was at an end, the fire continued on breathing but the house lay in silence. This is was I had always dreamed of, silence. To relax upon my couch and find myself blanketed in a comfort zone known as “calm”. To let my fingers dangle off the couch and allow my head to reach the far back pillow behind me and simply sink beneath the layers of red velvety leather. To inhale a deep breath of everything bundled up in a bomb and exhale the smoke and rest in the casting essence of, silence. My dream, understand, planned and organized, followed through and dedicated to this splendid night without darkness yet reaching it’s fingertips. This night was utterly ruined by my dream, this night was wrong, this night wasn’t capable of perfecting happiness. This night was the beginning of a nightmare to come. This night was a demon laying in wait, this night, this night was my worst fear after everything that has occurred. This night was not a dream at all, nothing more it was than a broken wish.

Hachi: A Dogs Tale was a heartwarming movie about loyalty based on the true story of Hachiko.

“In 1924, Hachiko was brought to Tokyo by his owner, Hidesaburo Ueno, a professor in the agriculture department at the University of Tokyo. During his owner’s life Hachiko saw him off from the front door and greeted him at the end of the day at the nearby Shibuya Station. The pair continued their daily routine until May 1925, when Professor Ueno didn’t return on the usual train one evening. The professor had suffered a stroke at the university that day. He died and never returned to the train station where his friend was waiting.

Hachiko was given away after his master’s death, but he routinely escaped, showing up again and again at his old home. After time, Hachiko apparently realized that Professor Ueno no longer lived at the house. So he went to look for his master at the train station where he had accompanied him so many times before. Each day, Hachiko waited for Professor Ueno to return. And each day he didn’t see his friend among the commuters at the station.

The permanent fixture at the train station that was Hachikō attracted the attention of other commuters. Many of the people who frequented the Shibuya train station had seen Hachiko and Professor Ueno together each day. Realizing that Hachiko waited in vigil for his dead master, their hearts were touched. They brought Hachiko treats and food to nourish him during his wait.

This continued for 10 years, with Hachiko appearing only in the evening time, precisely when the train was due at the station. The exact spot where Hachikō waited in the train station is permanently marked with bronze paw-prints and text in Japanese explaining his loyalty.”

Invisible Crown.

As the fairytale comes crumbling down and the prince walks away, the sea waves collide at my feet as I stare out into the blue. Alone, I squander the idea that we could be ideal. I squander the memory and the thought, my only dream from long ago.

A year earlier I had been burdened with a question I could not answer, lost of all my voice because I only wanted to be spoken to by my prince. I longed for him. “Would you be my Queen, my love?” this dainty, scrawny little brown-eyed boy dared to ask me as I sat on my beach chair enjoying the last of the sun, “would you join me to my final ball? Would you be mine a few months from now? Could you find it in you to be mine for a night?” he begged me.

As the sun grew smaller behind the mountain tops and layers of sunset I thought to myself, “oh why you my good sir, why must you ask when my eyes belong to another man, my Prince, my Prince I long for.” Some might say he knew what I was thinking, he knew that I was invisibly taken but I only answered with this. “Sir, oh you are a good sir, I shall not obey my order to my King and allow you my presence, I cannot be seen with you, I long for somebody else.”

This young brown-eyed boy found a Princess before those few months were up and they shared that night hand-in-hand for it was of all truth and purity, clutching no lies or restraint.

In this present day, I was not asked this question for a few months to come by my Prince, I was not asked by the one I longed for, I was only asked by another boy, a blue-eyed boy who also dreamed of having me as his Queen for just one night. I refused this, just as the other brown-eyed boy and longed for my Prince to find me upon the beach as the sun lay low and the darkness prowled over the ocean currents and sea breeze.

My Prince, the man that I longed for eventually took a stroll near where I resided and I glanced his way and he glanced mine and I yelled his way, “oh kind Prince, my knight, could you be mine if only for one night?” and this Prince stared my way, noticing my position and solemn tear and kept on walking the way he had began. I stood there, tear rolling down my left cheek and a gorgeous gown only specially made for one look to give me a chance to get noticed; wanted.

This night was it, my dream was shattered like Cinderella’s glass shoe in my present version and that was the end of the dream, my Prince would not ask for my hand, he would only expect me to grab his.

The wind picks up the dust and I find myself blinded.

Enemies, surrounding my vehicle as I tune it down to second gear slowly surfing the open road on some public highway in the middle of nowhere. Ghosts in the rear view and on top of my roof, ghosts clinging onto my hood and dragging their burnt out toes behind the rear, ghosts. A sudden urge to stop and they go flying, hunting down the scent of the girl they used to know as they prowl on over to the front seat window and I simply stare. A gaze to the left as one of them cracks the glass at the right, car rocking back and forth and side to side. This was it. My car was stopped and I even put the emergency brake on so god forbid it fucking rolls away with the legends of the past. I step out, I step out only to see the dusty roads adjacent to my position. Nobody was here, I had driven so far away from myself that I had lost it all. I was so far away, I was so gone ho on leaving that I had literally driven myself from sanity. I had leaked the rest of tears that were going to fall and no more ghosts were around me. I was utterly and completely alone here, and the satisfaction of this? Well I guess I was so fucking wrong, I was so wrong. The satisfaction of just running away and leaving it all behind, all the ghosts and legends that make you the way that you are. Everything; gone. This was it, all that I had left. Now here is the big question, how do you depend on somebody who caused all of your fucking problems? Even if, they were the only person that you had left?

Cute animals do cure many issues as they guide you through the labyrinth of hatred with a little bit of love and curiosity.

“One day in another’s home and a better understanding of that individual is processed.”
-ML

Family Vacation: all members of the family take part in activities together somewhere away from home.

This would mean that all the family members want to or are going.

It's just an opinion.

I need myself another dog, I know I have two but they are not mine. Belle, she was mine. A dog can’t be to much to ask for and it seems that would be freaking perfect for the upcoming weeks of drama enforced life. I need to buy myself a companion, something to come home to; a reason to stay. Next week is my English 12 final exam, next week is finishing another guide in Biology and studying and writing the Unit Test, it’s also a Field Trip and the week my parents leave… maybe this house will break, maybe my knees will be able to handle the fall or maybe I won’t even trip or stutter. I just might get some calls from all the places I applied to for work, and this would be a great feat of my withheld karma, however, what a wonderful feat it would be. I’m a little all over the place and might be hard to handle but if you see what I see everyday and you feel what I feel than you might come a little close to a complete understanding from an eyewitnesses standpoint. I have alot of conversations to begin and end, I have alot of things that need to be said and fulfilled, I have something to say and when I say it the world might be shaken up a bit and it just might send me over a cliff without a barrier. Good luck.

“There are so many people around me that need to change, and maybe I needed to change in order to be aware and truly witness it for myself.”
-ML

“One should not be able to compare their friends to a parasite.”
-ML

Family should go a little like this...

Five sugars and two creams please.

I applied for jobs and I guess my inspiration came from that.

I need to do something for myself, now what does a job seem to fit that? A job offers you a place to go, a place that gives back something, a place that calls you cause it actually needs you, a place of safety and a place of reason. A job allows an escape to another place where you don’t bring all of yourself because you can’t. A job is something that must be done and at some point you make sure that happens. People should treat life like that.

"Another day for myself, another day I would rather devote to somebody else."
-ML

F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

[Chandler's key broke in Monica's door]
Chandler: I love you.
Monica: I love you too.
Chandler: Are you hugging the door right now?
Monica: Um... no?
Chandler: Uh... yeah, yeah, me neither.

“Where is your heart at today?” -ML

“Just be there no matter what, that’s what really matters.”
-ML

Blades of Glory, this was a worthwhile laugh.

This movie was so cute, How To Train Your Dragon, I mean think about it… WHO WOULDN’T WANT ONE?! I freaking would, holy shit, like you can ride it and pet it and it will protect you. A friend? Absolutely. This image right here is just beautiful, it’s meeting halfway and it’s trusting a stranger. Life could be so much more beautiful if this happened more often.

"in sickness and in health", they really aren't lying.

So here’s the DL, in the middle of Spring Break I ended up in the doctor’s office and they swabbed my mouth and gave me some penicillin pills and off I went. A few days later I felt better and didn’t think to much about my results cause since I was feeling better I was assured it was Strep Throat. Moving on, next thing I know the pills are done and a sore throat and headache are back with even a bit of pressure in the middle of my upper body around my spleen section. Went back to the doctor and apparently having pressure on your spleen is a symptom of Mono… he doesn’t think it necessarily is because my glands didn’t look swollen but they feel like they are in the process. I have been through Mono once before, funny thing is it was this time last year… when I went through Mono I ended up at over five clinics and an EMT at one point. I ended my journey tired and crying in the hospital hooked up to IV cause they couldn’t get steroids into me fast enough. For a week a tube stayed in my arm and I was at the hospital in the morning and at night for more drugs, I thought I was going to die. So even though I may not have Mono the fear still stands and because there is not a cure out there, I’ll be getting fucking prescribed mouthwash and keeping an eye on my temperature and aches and pains… hopefully this doesn’t get any worse, whatever the hell it is.

I believe that most things happen for a reason.

Last night my friend's grandmother had a few strokes but she still came to school today and her grandma was still alive in the hospital. This morning when I arrived to school she got a phone call basically saying that if anybody wanted to see her grandmother than they had to get to the hospital in fifteen minutes. So I asked if she needed a ride and we dropped everything to get there, her family was waiting so I dropped her off at the hospital door and drove away. Getting back to school I got a phone call of my own from my friend who simply said "Thank you so much Megan, I got there just in time to say I love you and that was it." Today I am a hero in somebody's eyes.

... and another one.

Last Passenger
Written by Megan Lizee

The wind is blowing past my windshield,
drops of rain splitting to either side.
Looking to my right, I glance into your beautiful hazel eyes.
Slippery roads, construction signs made blurry.
I wish this wasn’t just a memory.

You were my everything, my whole word in a sunshine rose.
My whole life in a girl who loved me for all that I am, all my downs and lows.
I miss you baby, I’m sorry lady.
The last night of my life, painted in every window of my car.

Dark skies and vivid eyes,
a clutch in my hand and a foot off the brake.
Shadows casted by the trees and stamped posts.
Screeching wheels and burnt impact,
a crash, a goodbye, a license taken from me.

Her screams haunting my consciousness tonight.
Laying in my bed afraid of the nightmares to reoccur, yet again.
I wish this wasn’t just a memory.

You were my everything, my whole word in a sunshine rose.
My whole life in a girl who loved me for all that I am, all my downs and lows.
I miss you baby, I’m sorry lady.
The last night of my life, painted in every window of my car.

The day before, we were smiling all the way home.
Street lights shining, across the blades of rain.
This night was our honeymoon, a sample of the happiness yet to come.
This night was everything, my last day of my life.
The last day of, my life.
I wish this wasn’t just a memory.

You were my everything, my whole word in a sunshine rose.
My whole life in a girl who loved me for all that I am, all my downs and lows.
I miss you baby, I’m sorry lady.
The last night of my life, painted in every window of my car.
The last day of my life.

Trying out song writing...

Wings Flying
Written by Megan Lizee

Sparkling stars and eyes of furry,
baby let’s run away without a worry.
Awaiting the luminous morning joyride,
offending all drunken teenagers with fragile pride.
We don’t need a party, we don’t need the moon,
we just need eachother, a love so strong that ended so soon.

Glide away with me baby, all passionate days waiting.
Fly away with me baby,
spread your wings out and feel the wind God gave you.
Take flight, glistening into the night, feel the world in your wings.
Pack every little thing in a suitcase,
and we’ll follow the road that was once a race.

Our age, our glory, with no need to ever say sorry.
We were attacked, beaten and bruised but we are still the same.
Frantically diving and twirling and spinning, now everything is steady.
The rivers have stopped and the future is frozen.
We were in love, now one’s an angel spreading her wings.

Glide away with me baby, all passionate days waiting.
Fly away with me baby,
spread your wings out and feel the wind God gave you.
Take flight, glistening into the night, feel the world in your wings.
Pack every little thing in a suitcase,
and we’ll follow the road that was once a race.

We will be together, forever, in a new world of pleasure.
We will hold hands again, we will run away and seek out a place to stay.
But for tonight, I’ll sit with you and stare up at the stars.
I wish you could see me baby, I wish you could see me.

Glide away with me baby, all passionate days waiting.
Fly away with me baby,
spread your wings out and feel the wind God gave you.
Take flight, glistening into the night, feel the world in your wings.
Pack every little thing in a suitcase,
and we’ll follow the road that was once a race.

Everyone always wants to look like somebody else, but did you even give a thought about the people that might be admiring you?
— ML

Dolph Lundgren is awesome.

“as a teenager Dolph was into music and played the drums and the trombone, performing on TV several times. Recently on the Swedish Eurovision Song Contest heats, Dolph was one of the hosts. Before the competition began, each host was asked to take part in a musical performance of their own and Dolph chose to do Elvis Presley’s “A Little Less Conversation”. Some people would content themselves with a bit of singing and dancing, but Dolph can’t dance so he adds in two karate demonstrations and a drum solo.

So there you go. Dolph’s not just the star of 40 action films, but also a talented musician, champion martial artist, former special forces soldier and a highly qualified chemical engineer. Don’t even think of breaking into his house.”

I LOVE THIS GUY !