I'm still here, learning how to live like everybody else, but I'm not doing it alone.

We all wander through life trying to find our niche, where we are meant to belong. We ponder our past, present, and future trying to discover where the missing piece is, why we lack the urge to stay where we presently stand. It’s this lifelong quest to create peace of mind, to fulfill the inner box and feel completely whole. The need to belong is international and yet sometimes we discover how far away it can turn out to be. However, sometimes when you take the time to look around, really look, you tend to see things that didn’t register before. I looked around today, as I comfortably sat around the table at The Keg, and I found a sense of belonging that didn’t occur to me before. I found a sense of self, a sense of moving on, a sense of bliss. I belong, right here, in the center of a growing family full of unique characters and different last names. I belong with the Thompson grandparents and the Northern cousins. I am proud to be a Lizee. I love my family and all the last names that connect to it. Tonight was a beautiful, heartwarming reflection on the familiar faces that surround me with laughter and love. I felt peace for the first time in a long time and I’m beginning to realize that I have choices and that I’m not just stuck with a specific handful of people or one path to walk. I’m allowed to wander between groups of friends and boys and stick out the rough patches alone if I feel like it. I’m getting back into the groove of doing homework and not being so anti-social when I get invited out. I’m just another teenage girl learning how to live life as best as she can. I’m making mistakes and drinking too much and I’m just enjoying the ride. Things happen, things change, things keep happening and things keep changing. Sometimes, you just have to live. Just let go and fucking live. I’m slowly learning how to do that and maybe one day I’ll figure it out but I know that I’m not doing it alone. I have my big, heartwarming family full of personality and excitement and friends come and go and lovers shouldn’t be temporary. I’m a Lizee and I’m going to be alright.